Do You Know Me?

So you decided to fight, to stay in your relationship with God even though you’re feeling not that into Him. And for some of you, you’ve already seen a big change. There’s a new connection. There’s excitement. But for others, you’re fighting and nothing’s happening. You’re working, but you’re not getting anything in return. So what’s the problem? It may be that “me” is getting in the way, that your focus is on you. And in the process, you have made God very small, boring and predictable—a God you think you know, but One who is actually so much bigger than us.

Bottom Line: When I am so focused on me, I can miss seeing God for who He really is and make Him into someone who is easy to walk away from.

Scripture References: Job 3:3, 11, 20-21; Job 7:19-20; Job 38:4-7; Job 42:2-6

Session Two: Fight for Me

Bottom Line: God never leaves, but sometimes I have to fight my own feelings and actions to stay in relationship with Him.

When you’re not that into a relationship, you have a choice—to stay or to go. God has made it very clear in the Bible that He’s not going anywhere. He’s in. But we’re the ones who struggle with the choice, and that struggle sometimes involves fighting our own feelings and perceptions. It’s a fight that we have to be willing to take on, and a decision each of us has to make. And though it may feel like it, it’s not one-sided, God isn’t going anywhere. So are you going to fight your own tendencies to pull away? Are you going to fight for your relationship with God?

Scripture References: 1 Timothy 1:18-19; Isaiah 49:15-16; 1 Timothy 6:12; 2 Timothy 4:7; Hebrews 13:5


Take some time this week to read Ecclesiastes 3:1-8. Read the verse keeping in mind where you are in your relationship with God. Understanding that there is a season for everything, what kind of season does it feel like you are in with your relationship with God? What kind of seasons have you been in before, and what kind of season are you hoping to arrive to?

Week 1: The Breakup?
There is a natural ebb and flow to our relationships, isn’t there? There are times when we feel really close to someone, and times when we don’t. The reasons vary, but there are times when we’re just not feeling that into a relationship. It’s true of our friendships and other relationships, but what happens when it’s in our relationship with God? And when it does happen, why is it so difficult to admit it?

Bottom Line: My relationship with God has moments when I feel close, and moments when I’m just not that into Him.

Scripture References: Jeremiah 2:28-29, 32; Deuteronomy 8:7-17

NOT THAT INTO YOU:

Every one of us has experienced it at some point. At one time, we were really into a relationship—whether that’s a friendship or a dating relationship—and now, well, not so much. We’re just not that into it anymore. So we walk away or we let the relationship die. But what happens when that relationship you’re not that into anymore is the one you have with God? You were really into Him at one point. You were feeling connected, directed, close. Now it feels like nothing. How do you deal with it?

High school reunions can be either something we eagerly look forward to, or anxiously dread. The reasons for our excitement or our hesitation are usually the same—the people. We’re concerned about who we will encounter from our past and the lasting impression they had on us—for better or for worse—and the lasting impression we had on them. And no relationship has the ability to leave an impression, for better or worse, than a dating relationship. Dating relationships just have a lot of potential to do great good, or harm in the mark they leave. So this week we are going to help students explore dating from the perspective of the one they date. We want to challenge students this week to think about their own responsibility, regardless of where they may have been in the past, to always consider what they can do in the future to make someone’s story better, and to treat them in a way that will be beneficial and positive in the long run.

In Chap Clark’s book, Disconnected, he says that parents are responsible for providing the boundaries necessary to help a child grow into the person God has created and redeemed them to be. That’s a pretty heavy task. It requires first that parents know where the child is—an ongoing challenge in itself. And second, it requires that parents know where the dangers lie, where the areas of caution are and what signals indicate that something might be holding the child back.

In this series, we are talking with your child about dating. But more importantly we are talking about balance. In a world where finding a boyfriend or girlfriend sometimes becomes all-consuming, we want to remind students that dating is only one of many areas in their lives. Like everything else, it is good in moderation, when it is not taken to extremes. We also want to help them develop healthy relationships, whether those are dating relationships or friendships with the opposite sex, and help them understand the value in leaving a positive impression in the lives of those we come in contact with.

As a mother or as a father, you are in a better position than anyone to know and understand how dating works in your child’s life. Maybe they haven’t dated anyone, but they are constantly thinking about ways to find that perfect someone. Maybe they haven’t been alone since fourth grade. Maybe they’ve been dating the same person for the past two years. Wherever they fall on the spectrum, you are viewing the situation close-up. Their emotions are in it. You, who have more insight and more life experience, can look down the road for them when they don’t have the perspective to do it on their own. Are there dangers ahead? Is there something that might be holding them back from experiencing the life they were intended for?

I would like to challenge you to take a few minutes this month to reflect on your child’s situation—especially in the area of dating. Think of ways you can be creative and helpful as you set boundaries and help them navigate the wonderful and risky world of relationships.

“Don’t put all of your eggs in one basket!” We’ve all heard the phrase before, some of us have probably even used it a time or two, but when it comes to dating, it can be pretty hard to actually put into practice. We live in a culture where marketing, events and entertainment are driven by romantic relationships, where people are profiled based on relationship status, and where love and romance are a part of our daily conversations. For many students it just seems normal, almost expected to devote all of their time, energy and affection to acquiring or maintaining a dating relationship. This week we’re going to talk to students about finding balance as they learn to fit dating into the many other, equally important, areas of life.

We will be kicking off the month of February with a relationship series called Love sick! Make sure your students make it to "Vision" on Sunday morning or "Canvas" on Wednesday night from 7:00- 8:30pm. Here is a description of what we will be talking about in February!
There’s something pretty amazing about being in love, isn’t there? The butterflies in your stomach. The dreamy gazes. No wonder so many of us are so in love with being in love. But if you look around—in the media, at school, in life—we’ve taken what God created and twisted it, morphed it and configured it into something it was never meant to be—an obsession. When romantic relationships become an obsession, balance goes out the window. We miss out on opportunities and experiences we might otherwise have had. And sometimes we even forget who we are. There’s got to be healthier way to do this. There’s got to be another way than being so lovesick.